In Brief

One important part of helping others is having been where they are (or where they are headed) so they can relate to you as someone who has felt their pain and can give hope. This list (mostly in chronological order) is here for that reason. I focus mostly on the tough experiences. There have been plenty of good times too - but people don't generally seek help when life is easy. I have experienced:

• how it feels to be on the witness stand - I have had to testify more than once, in defense of myself and others.
• the feeling that a law suit brings - my family lost our farm through one.
• what it is like to have hope taken by injury - mainly football. I still love to watch but that is about all I dare do.
• what it is to love the country but leave to live in 'the big city'... like Paris, Miami, Caracas and Hong Kong.
• the pressure to compromise my integrity at risk of my job - pay a price for it - then to be vindicated.
• what it means to have an employee betray (accuse me unfairly behind my back) to my boss, and have the boss believe it.
• the challenges of crossing cultures - travel, study, work, and live ... in Europe, Africa, Asia and all three Americas.
• what it means to disappoint my family (and to have them disappoint me) ... and to learn to do better and trust again.
• the stresses of learning and working in new languages: French, Spanish, and a little Greek.
• the joys and sorrows of non-profit work: famine relief in West Africa, hosting in homes for single pregnant girls and refugees.
• what it means to not know at the beginning of the month where the money would come for the end of the month.
• what it means to fly high and then crash; to dine with ambassadors and when dining out meant fast food.
• how it feels to be in a situation where I had to depend on the kindness and generosity of others.
• how hard professional ministry can be - mainly from being an inner city pastor for five years.
• what it means to be profoundly hurt; to survive deep darkness of soul; to wait for the light ... and to forgive.
• the destructive power of false accusations, but also know what it feels like to be forgiven for real sins.
• what it means to have someone I love deeply turn against me, reject me, and refuse to reconcile with me.
• the feeling of complete shock at an unforeseen layoff, the pain of the job search, and the joy of a fresh start.
• the privilege of watching someone suffer with grace and question whether I will ever learn to be that gracious.
• what it means to keep grinding for years on something that feels like it will never be done, and the immense relief when it is.
• what it means to pray for something for decades only to see the answer to my prayers in the last possible hour.